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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22425694">The Falcon and the Wolf</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/icemink/pseuds/ClockworkCrow'>ClockworkCrow (icemink)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Costume Parties &amp; Masquerades, F/M, Fix-It, Fluff and Angst, Loss of Powers, Post-Canon, Rey has a fluffy tail, Senator Ben Solo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 18:14:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>15,991</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22425694</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/icemink/pseuds/ClockworkCrow</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>On the fifth anniversary of the destruction of Starkiller Base the Senate is throwing a masked ball and invited members of the old Resistance. Still trying to rehabilitate his image, Senator Ben Solo has no choice but to attend.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>74</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>192</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Comfort Gems 2020, For one is both and both are one in love: The Reylo Fanfiction Anthology's Valentine's Day Exchange, Reylo Hidden Gems</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/reylotrash711/gifts">reylotrash711</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Thanks to my betas celestialsprouts and <a href="https://miranda13ao3.tumblr.com/">@miranda13ao3</a> any remaining mistakes are my own, and likely due to stubbornness.</p>
<p>Written to fulfill this prompt:</p>
<p>Ben and Rey dance at a masked ball, unaware of who they are dancing with. Until the masks are taken off at midnight. Romance and Sexual Tension ensue, will they be able to refrain their urges? Hell no.</p>
<p>But I also mixed in a healthy dose of this prompt as well:</p>
<p>Prompt 2 - What if Ben was unable to bring Rey back and had to call on the help of the Skywalkers that came before him? Is he ready to pay the price of losing his force sensitivity for the women he loves?</p>
<p>My lovely beta Miranda also made this little manip for me <a href="https://miranda13ao3.tumblr.com/post/190899186010/the-falcon-and-the-wolf-on-the-fifth-anniversary">little manip for me </a></p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"How is it a good idea for me to go to this again?" Senator Ben Solo asked his assistant.</p>
<p>Zarli rolled her eyes while she made sure the white feathers were securely attached to his coat. "If you don't go, people will think it means something."</p>
<p>It was a difficult task for the small woman, but Zarli wasn't the sort to be daunted by little things like height, and without a second thought, she pulled over a chair and stood on it.</p>
<p>A moment later, she decided that her brightly colored reflective jacket was an encumbrance to the task, so she took it off and tossed it over the chair. Her hair was bright blue at the roots and transitioned into emerald green. She didn't seem like the typical Senate aid, but she was smart, she was tough, and she was never afraid to tell Ben what she thought.</p>
<p>She was also great at managing his image, even though she refused to give up the facade of a street kid from Coronet City.</p>
<p>"It's a masked ball, no one will notice if I'm there or not," he pointed out, as he looked with some dismay at the white-feathered mask that was waiting for him.</p>
<p>"Everyone takes their masks off at midnight," she reminded him. "So make sure you’re seen once the masks come off. This party is to celebrate the Fifth Anniversary of the destruction of Starkiller Base. People will read way too much into it if you aren't there." Zarli insisted. "Like maybe that you don't want to celebrate. And this might be your one chance to talk to Senator Ette. The masks will let him pretend that he doesn't know it's you."</p>
<p>He sighed. A part of him knew Zarli was right. He just wished he'd thought more about this sort of thing when he'd agreed to run for Senate three years ago. What was worse, he should have known better. He remembered as a child, his mother always having to go to some party, fundraiser, or event. He'd resented her for it then, and now he realized that she probably would have much rather stayed home with him.</p>
<p>
  <b>Give me strength mother.</b>
</p>
<p>He sent the thought out there, knowing no one was listening. Or if they were, he would never know.</p>
<p>His mind was quiet these days. It had been ever since Exegol. There were no voices, no whispers, no sense of what others were feeling, or the currents of the Force around him. There was just Ben Solo.</p>
<p>
  <i><b>Help Me!</b> he screamed wordlessly into the void as he cradled Rey's body. It couldn't end like this. She deserved to live. If anyone deserved to live, it was her.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>He didn't expect an answer. His life had been one without answers. But this time he wasn't asking for himself, he was asking for her.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Then the dark Sith temple was filled with warm blue light as three ghosts appeared before him. Father, son, and daughter, Anakin, Leia, and Luke.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Anakin knelt in front of him. "There will be a cost," he told his grandson.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>"Anything," Ben promised. Rey was, after all, worth everything.</i>
</p>
<p>He didn't regret it. He would never regret saving Rey. But that didn't make it any easier. Especially since things hand’t turned out the way he might have hoped. He had thought it would all turn out differently somehow. Not that he'd really been thinking about anything other than saving her. </p>
<p>He could still see that look of joy on her face when he brought her back, still feel her lips as she kissed him. At that moment, it had seemed like the whole future lay ahead of them.</p>
<p>How foolish he had been.</p>
<p>Zarli finished adjusting his coat and went to reach for the mask. Ben turned towards the mirror and took in the damage. The long white coat was made so that it wouldn't close in front, and under it, he was only wearing a black shirt that closed only at the neck, leaving his entire chest exposed.</p>
<p>The look was finished by fitted white slacks, and of course, matching shoes.</p>
<p>He tugged on the edge of the shirt. "I thought I wasn't allowed to wear black," he teased Zarli.</p>
<p>One of Zarli's missions in life was to try and make it so that no one remembered he had ever gone by the name of Kylo Ren.</p>
<p>"Black covered by white is okay. It's symbolic," she said, handing him the mask.</p>
<p>"Uh-huh," he joked. "You know me, symbolism and masks are a dangerous combination. Also red, purple, those are also colors that are not black." </p>
<p>"You're really going to lecture me on color options?" she raised an eyebrow at him.</p>
<p>He looked at the yellow and green reflective jacket she'd thrown over the chair, and knew this was a lost battle.</p>
<p>"Besides," she added. "You're a Corellian falcon, and they don't come in red or purple."</p>
<p>He put on the white mask with its silver beak and fan of white plumes. It was clearly a bird mask, yet he was pretty sure no one was going to know he was supposed to be specifically a Corellian falcon.</p>
<p>"People are going to think I'm an escort," he commented as he saw the full look.</p>
<p>"Good, then they'll talk to you," she teased him. "Besides, there probably won't be escorts at this party. Remember, they've invited all sorts of old Resistance fighters. No doubt, the lecherous old Senators are hoping to take home some hot young war hero. If anything, they'll probably think you're a pilot or something."</p>
<p>“I <i>am</i> a pilot,” he reminded her.</p>
<p>"Of course you are," she agreed. "Just like any good Corellian boy. Flying's in your blood."</p>
<p>She was really making fun of him now, but he let it be.</p>
<p>"And if someone from the Resistance recognizes me?" He asked.</p>
<p>"You're big, you can probably take a punch or two," she teased him. Then she frowned. "Seriously, though, don't start any fights. You cannot be seen fighting with Resistance heroes."</p>
<p>"I know," he sighed.</p>
<p>She was right; of course, he could more than take a punch. She had no idea of the kind of physical punishment he had endured as Snoke’s apprentice. What bothered him was knowing that once he wouldn't have had to. That he could have used the Force to freeze an opponent before they could ever strike him.</p>
<p>But those days were long gone. Ben could no longer feel or use the Force. It was one of the reasons he had been allowed to go free after the war; he wasn't supposed to be a threat anymore.</p>
<p>That should have been a good thing, but there were times when he thought he would rather spent his days in prison than be without the Force. Of course, the New Republic didn't have a prison that could have held him with his old powers so…</p>
<p><i>I did it for Rey,</i> he reminded himself. <i>It was worth it to save her.</i> He only wished he knew where she was.</p><hr/>
<p>"Why do I have to go to this?" Rey asked again.</p>
<p>"Because you're a symbol of hope, and people need to remember their victories," Poe told her.</p>
<p>"I'm wearing a mask," Rey argued. "No one will know I'm a symbol of hope."</p>
<p>Poe sighed. "We take off the masks at midnight. The idea is for you to meet people without them knowing who you are, and without you knowing them so that you can talk to people you wouldn't otherwise. Besides, there will be a buffet," he reminded her.</p>
<p>"Well, if there's a buffet," Rey acquiesced. </p>
<p>Of course, it was too late at this point to turn back. Rey was already dressed for the event. Considering all the time and effort she'd spent fighting to make sure her outfit wasn't too ridiculous, it seemed like a waste of effort not to go.</p>
<p>She had refused all attempts to decorate her with embellishments like jewels. However, she had allowed some silver paint on her black Loth-wolf mask. She had also managed to keep the dress simple and black, fighting tooth and nail against having a train. Instead, she had conceded that since she was supposed to be a wolf, she could have a furry tail. The dress had no back and was held up in front by a collar.</p>
<p>Rey wasn't ready for the spectacle that was the masked ball. As she entered the ballroom, she had the distinct feeling she'd been in starship hangers that were smaller. There had to be hundreds of people there. Even so, there was plenty of space among the crowd. A good thing, considering the grand costumes some of the guests were wearing.</p>
<p>Tables lined the walls with--Rey was happy to see--towers of food, while droids moved around the crowd offering people drinks and hors d'oeuvres. </p>
<p>The entrance to the ballroom was actually from the second level. A grand staircase swept down into the main room. A balcony ran around the perimeter so people could watch everyone down below.</p>
<p>"Well, this is a lot," Rose said disapprovingly.</p>
<p>"Yeah, but it's for a good cause," Poe reminded her. "Us heroes get in for free, but everyone else paid a lot of money to come to this, and that money goes to help survivors of the Hosnian System."</p>
<p>"Well, I'm going to find the buffet," Rey said, as she slipped into the crows away from her friends. </p>
<p>It was really good seeing Poe again after all these years, but the last few days had also reminded her how simply Poe saw the world. It was still a world of good guys and bad guys to him, and today the good guys got to celebrate.</p>
<p>It reminded her how strongly opposed Poe had been to letting Ben into their base after Exegol. It didn't matter that he'd saved Rey's life, that he'd fought alongside her against Palpatine. To Poe, Ben Solo would always be Kylo Ren.</p>
<p>Thank goodness for Finn. He'd just been getting the hang of his Force-sensitivity back in those days, but he'd been willing to vouch that Ben no longer had access to the Force. She was so grateful for Finn and so proud of the Jedi he'd become over the last few years.</p>
<p>She was also a little jealous because Finn had Rose. </p>
<p>It was a bitter reminder of the trip Rey had taken to Tatooine. She had invited Ben along, she'd even waited until things had settled down until the threat that he'd be put on trial had passed so it wouldn't look like he was running away. But he hadn't wanted to come. And when she'd returned, he was gone.</p>
<p>Mostly Rey was happy for Finn and Rose. They'd even talked about it, as they'd dug into more and more Jedi texts together and found the bans on attachment.</p>
<p>
  <i>" Rose couldn't bring out the dark side in you if she tried," Rey assured Finn. "And the old Jedi Masters, they'd didn't know everything. Trust me, they screwed a lot of things up." </i>
</p>
<p>At first, she'd talked to him vaguely about what she knew of Luke Skywalker. Except the more she learned about the old Jedi, the more she came to believe that they had kept too many secrets.</p>
<p>It was hard telling Finn about what Skywalker had done, about how Ben Solo became Kylo Ren. She couldn't put into words why she hadn't wanted to share it with him, except that it led to telling him about the bond. Little by little, it all came out, and before she knew it, Rey found herself crying in her best friend's arms.</p>
<p>
  <i>" So let's go find him," Finn had tried to convince her. "If you guys really had this bond, then you probably belong together."</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Rey shook her head. "He left Finn. The bond is gone and…I guess maybe it was never what I thought it was." </i>
</p>
<p>He still brought it up from time to time, but it had been years now, and Rey wasn't even sure how she would find him. Or what she would say if she did. </p>
<p>Tonight, she decided, she wasn't going to worry about any of that. She hadn't wanted to come to this silly masked ball, but now that she was here, she was excited by the idea.</p>
<p>These last few days, celebrating the destruction of Starkiller Base, Rey had been overwhelmed by people knowing who she was. Everyone seemed to want to talk to the Jedi, to ask her about what it had been like to fight Kylo Ren.</p>
<p>In the time since Exegol, she had mostly been able to keep a low profile. Ben had actually been the one to encourage her to downplay her part in the Resistance’s victory. Not because he thought she didn't deserve the credit, but because he'd seen first hand the toll fame had taken on this family.</p>
<p>But these last few days, she'd had to come up with a series of canned answers. They sounded good, seemed to satisfy people, weren't really lies, but weren't anywhere near the truth. Because people didn't really want to hear the truth about what it was like to meet one of your heroes and then watch them die. To be alone in a snowy field while the only friend you've ever had, and who you only just met, was possibly dying.</p>
<p>She certainly couldn't explain what it felt like to feel Kylo Ren slowly coming apart across a bond she didn't even understand existed yet. Oh, and never mind the fact that she was also Emperor Palpatine's granddaughter. Which probably didn't matter, but was also this secret she carried around with her. The one thing that even Finn and Rose didn't know.</p>
<p>None of that mattered right now, because she had a mask. She could be anyone, and even better, she could be no one again. She forgot how much she missed being no one.</p>
<p>Also, there was a buffet, so it couldn't be too bad a time.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is a strange thing for me, posting all of a multi-chapter fic at once. So please  I'd love to know what you think on the various chapters.</p><p>  <a href="https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Coronet_City">Coronet City</a><br/><a href="https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Loth-wolf">Loth-wolf</a></p><p> </p><p><a href="https://www.asos.com/au/club-l-london-tall/club-l-london-tall-high-neck-backless-fishtail-maxi-dress-in-white/prd/12324609">This</a> was the inspiriation for Rey's dress, only she's wearning white.</p><p>I couldn't quite find anything exactly like what I wanted for Ben's costume but was heavily inspired by <a href="https://i.pinimg.com/736x/fb/67/b1/fb67b1a36d4358478043833c3551f74f.jpg"> this</a>. I just thought the metal feathers might be a bit too uncomfortable.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Zarli had underestimated just how many people would be here, Ben decided. Sure, somewhere in the crowd were undoubtedly influential Senators who it would benefit him greatly to find and talk to. People who typically wouldn't want to be seen with him, but might give him a few minutes since they could feign ignorance of who he really was. But there were so many people at the ball that he doubted his chances of finding any of them. At least Senator Ette was Gungan, and there couldn't be many Gungans here.</p><p>It was moments like this when he missed his connection to the Force most of all. He had never appreciated the way his instincts had led him to be in the right place at the right time, how things had so often simply fallen into place for him until it was gone. These days anytime anything worked out for him, he was surprised.</p><p>Supposedly even if he couldn't feel it, the Force should still be there guiding him as it supposedly guided all things. That's what he'd always been taught, and he'd often wondered how others couldn't believe in it. But now that Ben had lost his Force-sensitivity, he understood. Now he knew what it was like to be lost in a crowd.</p><p>A mask caught his eye from across the room. A Loth-wolf? He felt foolish as he started to make his way across the room towards the mask. It was just a mask, after all, not a sign from the Force. It probably wasn't even a Loth-wolf, just some other carnivorous creature with vaguely similar features.</p><p>Few people even knew what a Loth-wolf was, and those that did couldn't agree if they were extinct, or if they had ever existed at all. Yet there were old Jedi legends of the beasts who were believed to have a deep connection to the Force and even acted as spiritual guides.</p><p>He knew it was silly to believe that the mask was anything other than a costume. On the other hand, he'd feel kind of like an ass if he spent all this time wishing the Force would send him a message and then ignoring anything that might look like a message.</p><p>Besides, as he moved through the crowd and caught a few more glimpses of the mask, he found a new motivation. An absolutely stunning woman was wearing it.</p><p>Her back was turned towards him at the moment, his eyes were drawn down her naked spine. He admired her pale but freckled skin and the way the dark fabric settled on her hips, where, of all things, she wore a dark fuzzy tail. </p><p>It was so odd and adorable, and he didn't know if he wanted to pet it, tug on it, or maybe just move it aside to get a better view of her ass. </p><p>He knew he was foolish to approach her. He had made one or two terrible attempts at flirting in the last few years. It was not a skill a lifetime as a Jedi, and then a Knight of Ren had prepared him for. His fame didn't help. Anyone he met had already formed an opinion about him, rarely a good one.</p><p>Oh, and then there had been that one woman who had been trying to collect a bounty on him.</p><p>He reminded himself, he was masked. Maybe anonymity would allow him not to make a fool of himself. Or at least any more of a fool considering the massive amount of feathers he was wearing.</p><p>Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself and decided to approach the Loth-wolf.</p>
<hr/><p>Rey was moving with delight down the buffet table. It was a bit annoying that everything was divided into small bite-size pieces, although considering the masks some of the guests were wearing, it was perhaps necessary. And she supposed this made it easier to try a variety of things, and come back for the treats she liked best.</p><p>Although she wasn't sure what those would be because so far, everything she'd tried had been fantastic. Her days of starvation and living off dehydrated rations were long behind her. Still, life as an itinerant Jedi didn't exactly give her many chances to eat delicacies.</p><p>"Um, excuse me," a man said awkwardly behind her.</p><p>Rey stiffened. She suddenly found herself wondering if there was some sort of rationing at the party she didn't know about. There was so much food, surely she hadn't taken too much?</p><p>She turned slowly around, expecting to be chastised.</p><p>She didn't expect to turn around and be immediately confronted with a naked chest. A charming naked chest. Well, perhaps not completely naked. The man was wearing a jacket that was open in front, but there was no significant piece of clothing under it.</p><p>Rey didn't have that many chests to compare it to, only one really, and that one had more scars and more muscles. That chest would always be the superior chest in her mind, but this man had nothing to be ashamed of.</p><p>Which she supposed was why he had decided to show up to, what she thought was supposed to be a respectable party filled with important people, without a shirt. </p><p>It took her a moment to gather her thoughts enough to look up because even with the heels on her shoes, he was still taller than her. Actually, he was very tall.</p><p>"Um, hello," she said nervously.</p><p>"Would you…would you like to dance?" he asked, holding out his hand.</p><p>"No," she said without thinking. She'd seen the couples dancing on the floor. They looked so graceful and elegant. Rey knew how to strip a ship down for parts, how to fight three enemies at once without breaking a sweat. She had no idea how to dance.</p><p>"Of course, forgive me," he said sadly.</p><p>His mask obscured his face, but she could tell from the way his head dropped, and his shoulders slumped, indicating that she'd hurt his feelings, and she instantly felt terrible.</p><p>He started to turn to leave her alone, but she put her hand on his arm to stop him.</p><p>"Sorry, I just don't know how."</p><p>He paused and looked at her. "Then, you need a teacher."</p><p>She couldn't help but laugh as she realized she'd heard almost those exact words five years ago to the day, although under much different circumstances. </p><p>That's when she made up her mind. A long time ago, she'd had something special, something unique in the galaxy. She'd been one-half of a dyad in the Force. But that was over now. </p><p>She envied what Rose and Finn had, even though it wasn't the same as what she'd briefly shared with Ben. Whoever this man was, he'd never be Ben. She might not even end up really liking him, but she'd never know if she walked away. </p><p>"Are you offering?" she asked. </p><p>"Yes," he nodded quickly. </p><p>"Okay, but if I trip and fall and make a fool of myself, it's your fault."</p><p>"I doubt there is a power in the galaxy that could make you look foolish, so I'll take that chance."</p>
<hr/><p>Ben was grateful that at events like this where there were representatives of dozens of Galactic cultures, everyone seemed to agree to stick to a simple waltz since that was all he knew.</p><p>Even so, Ben was a little terrified he'd be the one to do something ridiculous as he led her out to the floor as he was once again reminded just how big his own feet were. Even so, he managed to show her a simple box step without stepping on her feet once, and it didn't take long until they fell into a simple rhythm.</p><p>This was the best idea he'd ever had. One hand rested on the small of her back, he was amazed by how soft and warm her skin was. It was also distracting. He realized he should probably try to start a conversation, but Ben couldn't think of what to say and wasn't sure he should say anything while they danced.</p><p>"So have you been to many of these sorts of things?" she asked, which at least saved him from starting the conversation.</p><p>"Political fundraisers, yes. Masked balls, no. This is my first."</p><p>"So this is your first bird outfit then?" she teased him.</p><p>"Corellian falcon," he said defensively. "And it was my assistant's idea," he tried to shift the blame.</p><p>"Assistant? you must be important then?"</p><p>"Not really…well not anymore." Why couldn't he say anything, right? The last thing he wanted to do was talk about himself or try to impress her by acting mighty. Yes, he had once been Supreme Leader, but it wasn't a point in his favor. "Should we try a spin?" he asked, trying to distract her.</p><p>"Uh, sure," she replied.</p><p>He thought she was maybe laughing at him, but she wasn't trying to get away either so that at least was positive.</p><p>He felt sorry that he had to let go of her waist for the spin, but as she turned back towards him, he could see the hint of a smile under her mask. Her hand landed half on his jacket half on his bare chest before she shifted it slightly so that it was entirely on his chest.</p><p>"A falcon, hmm?" she said. "I think I like your assistant's taste."</p><p>He wondered if she could feel his heart pounding. Zarli definitely deserved a raise for this.</p><p>"I didn't know there were actual falcons on Corellia," she continued.</p><p>"Not many anymore, I'm afraid, outside a few preserves. They're endangered these days. Several new factory towns were built under the Empire, which drained many of the remaining wetlands, and the temperature pollution from the industrial runoff has been creating more violent storms which…" His voice trailed off as he suddenly realized he was regurgitating the information his staff had been drilling into him these last few years.</p><p>He must seem like the most boring person in the galaxy. Except he wasn't. He was Ben Solo, he used to be Kylo Ren. There were a thousand far more exciting stories he could tell her. But she was almost certainly one of the Resistance fighters who'd been invited to celebrate the destruction of Starkiller Base. He could only imagine what she'd think if she'd realized who it was, she was dancing with.</p><p>It was probably better to be boring.</p><p>"Is that from making ships?" she asked.</p><p>She actually seemed interested, and now he couldn't remember what exactly he'd been saying, which seemed to follow his luck tonight since he'd finally said something right.</p><p>"Is what..?"</p><p>"Temperature pollution?" </p><p>"Oh, yes," that's where he'd been in that little speech. "Yes, the factories require water to cool down the equipment. But there's nothing to cool down the water, most of it is released back into the oceans at a significantly higher temperature than is natural. It's devastating several ecosystems."</p><p>"Huh, I know how detrimental a crashed ship can be," she said thoughtfully. "But it never occurred to me that making new ones could hurt a planet as well. I guess I feel better now about trying to keep old ships in the air."</p><p>"So you're an engineer?" he asked hopefully. Ships and schematics were something he could talk about and actually be interesting, at least if they interested her.</p><p>"More a tinkerer, really. My friend, who <i>is</i> an engineer, likes to call what I do, creative modifications. Or when she is a bad mood, desperate modifications." Her voice was light, and he could tell she was smiling.</p><p>"Have you seen the new CEC hyperdrive motivator for Consular-class vessels?" he inquired expectantly.</p><p>"If it's new, I can promise you I haven't seen it," she laughed. "Why? Have they finally cleaned up their cronau radiation footprint?"</p><p>"Their footprint was never that bad. It's just Anaxes propaganda," he insisted, but secretly he was thrilled. He actually did have something in common with this charming little wolf, and it was a topic where he wouldn't make a fool of himself.</p><p>"Really, I've seen Star Destroyers leave less of an imprint on real space," she teased him as they began to argue the finer points of hyperspace engine specifications.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>
  <a href="https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Cronau_radiation">Cronau Radiation</a>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>  <a href="https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Anaxes">Anaxes</a></p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"You're miserable, aren't you," Finn asked Rose. He could tell she was trying really hard not to say too much about the ball, but he knew her too well not to realize she hated every moment of this party. </p><p>"I'm fine," she said, smiling weakly.</p><p>He loved so much that she was trying not to spoil the fun for him. However, this wasn't really Finn's idea of fun either, and watching Rose try and not ruin it for him was only making him dislike it more.</p><p>"No, you’re not, Rose Tico," he told her. "Look, Poe is clearly fine without us.” The pilot was not too far away happily chatting up a woman in a bright red dress with a feline mask. "And I'm guessing Rey probably isn't enjoying this much either. Or she's in love with the buffet and never wants to leave. Hard to know," he shrugged. "You let Poe know we're going, and I'll go find Rey."</p><p>"Okay, but if Rey wants us to stay, we're not abandoning her," Rose said, but she was clearly relieved at the idea of leaving.</p><p>"Promise," he assured her. "I'll be back in just a bit."</p><p>He moved out into the crowd to find Rey, focusing on her Force signature. He was surprised when it led him away from the food, and out toward one of the balconies that looked over Galactic City.</p><p>But when he saw who she was talking to, it made sense. Finn had to admit he was surprised to see Ben Solo after all these years, especially at an event commemorating the destruction of Starkiller Base.</p><p>Once, seeing him might have angered Finn. After all, it was five cycles to the day since Kylo Ren had nearly killed him. However, a lot had happened since then, for both of them. Even if Finn hadn't been able to feel how Ben Solo had changed after Exegol, his years of Jedi training had taught him to mistrust anger and hatred and try and move past them.</p><p>Besides, Finn had never forgotten what had happened on Jakku. Kylo Ren had known that Finn hadn't fired on the villagers, looked at him, and done nothing. The way the First Order had worked, Kylo Ren could have killed Finn on the spot; perhaps he should have to make an example. And even if Kylo Ren couldn't have been bothered to kill a lowly stormtrooper, he should have reported Finn then and there.</p><p>They had never talked about that moment, but Finn knew he owed the former Knight of Ren his life or at least his mind. Had Finn been reconditioned, he might never have escaped the First Order.</p><p>Also, few people could understand how overwhelming the pressure to believe in the First Order had been; to believe that you were part of something bigger than you that was going to make the galaxy better. It had all been lies, but when everyone else seems to believe the lie, it was hard to think you were the wrong one.</p><p>And from what Finn had learned from Rey, Kylo Ren may have been just as deceived as the rest of them.</p><p>So Finn could move past the things Kylo Ren had done as part of the First Order. However, he was only half sure he could move past what Ben Solo had done to Rey. Finn had seen the look in Rey's eyes when she'd come back from Tatooine and learned that Solo had just left without saying a word. Eventually, Rey had broken down and cried in Finn's arms and admitted how she'd felt about Ben.</p><p>He was less forgiving on that front.</p><p>But seeing them sitting and talking together, seeing Rey laugh at something Finn couldn't hear. Well, maybe he wasn't going to let Ben Solo entirely off the hook, but if he could still make Rey happy, Finn wasn't going to be the one to mess it up.</p><p>Except he couldn't just sneak out of the party without telling Rey they were leaving. He considered for a moment going back to Rose and telling her they had to stay because he didn't want to risk interrupting whatever was happening between Rey and Ben.</p><p>He knew Rose would understand, that she wouldn't stay for Rey, but he also didn't want to watch Rose be miserable for the rest of the night.</p><p>Then, he realized, maybe letting Rey know she didn't have to worry about them would be a good thing. Rey could take care of herself, and she would be free to either leave the party on her own whenever she wanted or go with Ben if that was what she wanted.</p><p>His mind made up, Finn decided to speak up.</p><p>"Hey there," he called out as he stepped onto the balcony. Rey jumped to her feet, and he felt bad for disturbing them. "Sorry to bother you, R-"</p><p>"No names," she hissed at him, trying to cover his mouth, which didn't work as great with the mask. "Uh, sorry, it's just, we um, decided that it was kind of nice being anonymous for the night," she explained.</p><p>He looked at her a little confused. She wasn't serious, was she?</p><p>"So you two don't know who each other are?" he asked disbelievingly.</p><p>Maybe it was a game they were playing, he thought. Perhaps it made it easier for them to work through their past?</p><p>"Well, that's the point, isn't it?" Rey asked. "A masked ball, and all that."</p><p>"So you don't know his name? You’re talking and you have no idea who he is?" he clarified.</p><p>"Yes, why?" Rey asked.</p><p>Ben had stood up and was trying to give them some space. "If you need to speak to your…friend..?"</p><p>"Oh, it's nothing," Finn said, not wanting to give the other man a chance to leave. "I just wanted to let you know that R-my wife and I were going to take off if that's okay. You know how she feels about these kinds of things, and anyway, we didn't want you to look for us, so you should have fun."</p><p>He knew he sounded ridiculous, but the whole thing was ridiculous. For a few seconds, Finn had thought maybe he was wrong about the masked man's identity. I mean sure, Ben Solo was a huge guy, and pretty distinctive, but he couldn't be the only big guy with black hair in the galaxy.</p><p>But then he'd heard the man speak, and yeah, that was definitely Ben Solo. Nevertheless, Rey really didn't seem to realize it, and Ben didn't seem to know who Rey was either. Which seemed insane to Finn. Of course, there were a couple of champagne flutes sitting near them. Not that either of them seemed drunk.</p><p>"Oh! Is she feeling okay?" Rey asked, concerned for Rose.</p><p>"She's fine," Finn assured her. "Just, you know how she feels about things like this, conspicuous consumption and all that. But really, you should have fun. She'd hate it if we ruined your fun. So do that, have fun. We won't wait up."</p><p>Finn was really rambling now because he knew Rey well enough to be able to tell that she really was enjoying herself, and she wanted to stay. He didn't want to mess that up. If anyone deserved to have some fun, it was Rey.</p><p>Despite the rambling monologue, he managed to extract himself quickly and looked back just long enough to make sure that they had gone back to talking.</p><p>He hurried back to Rose.</p><p>"So Rey's having fun, I think. I mean, yes, and she should stay. Did you talk to Poe?" he asked Rose when he got back to her.</p><p>"Yeah, he's staying. And are you okay?" Rose asked.</p><p>For just a second, he considered not saying anything, but he knew Rose would get the story out of him sooner or later, and honestly, he really wanted to tell her. </p><p>"You'll never guess who Rey was talking to…" he paused for effect. "Ben Solo!"</p><p>Rose looked at Poe as if she was making sure he hadn't heard them, then pulled Finn further from the pilot. "Are you sure?" she whispered.</p><p>"Yeah," Finn whispered back. "Why are we whispering?" he asked.</p><p>She pulled him even further away, clearly not wanting Poe to hear.</p><p>"Look," she explained. "Maybe it was nothing but…you remember when Ben left suddenly? Well, that day, just before he disappeared, I saw Poe pull him aside, and Ben looked really upset afterward. And I think maybe…I mean, I don't know, but it would be kind of like Poe to think he needed to protect Rey or something. I mean, it was pretty obvious how she felt about him."</p><p>"You think he left because of Poe?"</p><p>"Maybe?" Rose said. "I mean, I can't prove it, but something happened there. They had that bond and all."</p><p>"You know about the bond?" Finn asked, surprised. He thought Rey had only shared that with him.</p><p>"You remember that club in Cloud City?" she teased him. "No, of course you don't because you can't hold your liquor. Well, after you passed out Rey got very confessional. So yeah, I know they were soulmates or something, then he lost the Force, it went away, and oh yeah, he broke her heart."</p><p>Finn's eyes went wide as an idea struck him. "That's it! They're Force blind!"</p><p>"They're what?" Rose asked.</p><p>"Look, it was super weird, but they were talking, but it was like they didn't recognize each other. And I mean yes, sure they were both wearing masks. But I mean masks were kind of Kylo Ren's thing. And this one didn't even change his voice. Except maybe that's it. They used to have this bond in the Force, this whole other way of sensing each other, and now that's gone, and with the masks…"</p><p>"You think masks are enough to keep them from recognizing each other?" Rose said.</p><p>"Maybe, in this case. It's like if I went deaf and blind, I might smell grease, say, and be reminded of you, but I wouldn't assume that it was you." He realized he'd misspoke. "Unless I also smelled that flower stuff you put in your hair, but you know, after four cycles, I might not remember exactly what that was like so…"</p><p>"Stop while you're ahead," Rose told him. "You really think they don't recognize each other?" she asked.</p><p>He shook his head. "I think they don't."</p><p>"So what happens at midnight when the masks come off?" she asked. "Oh man, I kind of want to stay and see. You think Rey will notice if we spy on them?"</p><p>Usually, he would have said yes without hesitation. Rey wasn't someone easy to sneak up on. But maybe…no, he realized he couldn't risk them ruining what might happen.</p><p>"Probably," he had to admit. "And I think maybe we owe it to her to let whatever’s supposed to happen, happen."</p><p>"Yeah," Rose said, a little disappointed. "You're right. And Rey can take care of herself. Although…if he does hurt her, you have my permission to kick his ass."</p><p>He smiled at his wife. She could be the sweetest person in the galaxy. That didn't mean she wasn't as tough as nails and wouldn't do anything to protect those she loved.</p><p>"Well, as long as I've got your permission…"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Are we being silly?" his little wolf—as he'd come to think of her--said once her friend left. "Not telling each other our names?"</p><p>"I'm wearing feathers, and you have a tail," Ben pointed out. "I think we're allowed to be a bit silly."</p><p>She liked that answer, because she took his hand and sat him back down on the bench where they'd been talking.</p><p>"Maybe that's why my friends aren't having fun," she said. "They are stuck being themselves."</p><p>"But you are? Having fun that is?" he asked.</p><p>"Yes," she admitted. "I didn't think I would, but I am."</p><p>"I'm glad. Honestly, I didn't think I'd enjoy this either, the party that is."</p><p>"But you have to come to a lot of these?" she asked. "Political fundraisers?"</p><p>He nodded. "Yes, but I don't want to complain." Considering the things he'd done, going to boring political parties hardly seemed like the worst penance.</p><p>"Liar," she teased him. "You do want to complain."</p><p>"I do," he admitted. "But I won't, because it will bore you, and drive you off, and then I will have to go find important people to talk to."</p><p>"You don't think I'm important?" she asked.</p><p>"No…I mean yes, you're important!” Why did he always manage to say things like this? "More important to me right now than any of them. I just meant…"</p><p>She laughed. "It's okay, I'm only teasing. But I'm curious now, what sort of things would you say to <i>important people</i>?"</p><p>"Nothing interesting," he admitted. "It would probably be about trade deals and tariffs-Kriff!"</p><p>He had forgotten all about finding Senator Ette. </p><p>"Tariffs are that bad, are they?" she asked.</p><p>"Yes," Ben said absentmindedly because he was trying to decide if he could live with himself if he did what he wanted, which was to stay and talk with her. He could just pretend that he couldn't find Senator Ette. No one would ever know.</p><p>Except for him.</p><p>"I'm so sorry," he said, taking her hands in his and doing his best to meet her eyes though the masks. "I want nothing more than to stay here and talk to you, but…there really is someone I have to find and talk to. And talking to him won't take long, but finding him might. And it's not fair of me to just ask you to sit here and wait for me. You should have fun and-"</p><p>She placed her hand over his mouth to stop his rambling, and he suddenly had to fight to stop himself from doing something even more embarrassing, like tasting the palm of her hand.</p><p>"So, you're right," she told him. "I'm not just going to sit here and wait for you to come back, but maybe I could help you find this person? I'm good at that sort of thing." Almost reluctantly, she pulled her hand away to let him speak.</p><p>Maker, he wanted to kiss her. Knowing his luck, he'd probably poke her eye out with the beak of his mask, so he wasn't going to dare try. After all, he hadn't been smart enough to think of asking her to come with him. There was a risk she'd figure out who he was, and then never want to have anything to do with him, but there wasn't much he could do about that. The masks were going to come off eventually anyway.</p><p>If only he'd never destroyed his old helmet, or repaired it faster. Then no one in the galaxy would have known what Supreme Leader Kylo Ren looked like, and he wouldn't be dreading the moment when she finally saw who he was.</p><p>But for right now, she was willing to stay by his side, and that needed to be enough. "I would like that," he told her as he stood up, still holding onto one of her hands.</p><p>She got up too, and he realized he should offer her his arm, but instead, he took a chance and let his hand settle on her back as he led her back towards the main crowd.</p>
<hr/><p>Rey was trying very hard to be useful and keep her eyes peeled for anyone that could be a Gungan. But really it was all the falcon's—as she was now calling him—fault that she couldn't concentrate.</p><p>His huge hand was on her back, and his thumb was doing this thing where it made little circles around her spine. All she could think about was what would happen if his fingers slipped under the fabric of her dress, and what that small circle he was doing might feel like elsewhere.</p><p>Oh, and then there were his lips, the only part of his face she could see under the mask. She could still feel how soft they had been under her palm. She wondered what being kissed by them might feel like. They seemed like very kissable lips.</p><p>Maybe once they found the person they were looking for, she could convince him to leave and go someplace where they could get rid of masks, and she could learn all about his lips and hands.</p><p>She realized that was an excellent reason to focus on the task at hand. The sooner they found this Gungan, the sooner she could have him to herself again.</p><p>"Maybe this way," she said, pulling him in a different direction, trusting to her instincts.</p><p>She was happy when he followed her without question because she didn't have a good explanation of why she thought they should go that way. Or rather, she knew exactly why she felt they should go this way. The last thing she wanted to do was explain about the Force.</p><p>He stopped suddenly and squeezed her back gently. "There he is," he confirmed.</p><p>She couldn't tell at first who he was referring to. The dizzying array of masks allowed humans and other species to blend in with each other. But as they got closer, the object of their search became more apparent.</p><p>"Quite a nice evening," her falcon said as they approached their target.</p><p>The Gungan wasn't very tall and had to look up at her falcon, but then again, he was so tall she supposed almost everyone had to.</p><p>"You have some nerve being here." The Gungan said rudely.</p><p>"Perhaps," her falcon responded. "Or perhaps I'm just another citizen enjoying the celebration."</p><p>The Gungan snorted at that.</p><p>"Whatever concerns you have, I'm not interested."</p><p>"Please, I'm only asking for a moment," he sounded desperate.</p><p>Rey wished she knew what she could say or do to help. But she had no idea who either of these men were, or why they should or shouldn't talk.</p><p>"Fine, I'll give you one minute. But only because your grandmother respected the Gungan."</p><p>Her falcon nodded. "I need you to release Corellia from the Treaty of 986," he said simply.</p><p>The Gungan laughed. "Why would we do that?"</p><p>"Because people on Corellia are starving," he said. "It was Palpatine that forced words like Corellia to place tariffs on agricultural imports from worlds other than Naboo, and I know it's helped make Naboo rich, but do you really want your people to prosper from remnants of Imperial corruption?"</p><p>"The treaty is almost fifty cycles old, no one else from Corellia has ever complained."</p><p>"Because since the Imperial era, my predecessors have all wanted to make sure that the only viable option to survive on Corellia is to work in their factories. And it's not just about Corellia. If we let regular market forces determine food prices, we would become a viable market for Dandoria, which would help lift their economy out of poverty too. I know it doesn't benefit Naboo directly, but it's the right thing to do."</p><p>"Working with you will make Senator Naberrie angry-"</p><p>"I know that but-"</p><p>"You should not interrupt. I don't like Naberrie. She's a stuck up Naboo. I'll set up a meeting. We'll talk more publicly."</p><p>"Thank you, Senator Ette. Thank you so much," her falcon said, relieved. </p><p>"I make no promises, except we will talk."</p><p>"Yes, of course," he said, but she could feel that tension that had been building inside him, drain away as they stepped away from the Gungan, clearly having been dismissed.</p><p>"Are people really starving on Corellia?" Rey asked. "I thought the Core worlds were all rich?"</p><p>"Upper management is rich," he told her. "The streets aren't littered with bodies, but most people have to choose between feeding their kids or sending them to the schools that would train them to become management, and I'm told starving children make poor students."</p><p>His voice was cold, and she had the impression that he was trying very hard to pretend not to care.</p><p>She leaned in a little closer to him. "Well, I'm glad we found him then."</p><p>She was adjusting the picture of him she had in her head. It had been a fun game over the course the night, trying to guess things about him. He'd given away his Corellian roots early on. The way he talked about engines, he had to be a pilot. But she hadn't been able to decide if he was some sort of higher up in the Corellian Engineering Corporation, or if he had been Resistance. There was something familiar about him, and maybe he was just someone she'd never gotten to know that well and forgotten about.</p><p>Now she realized he was probably a Senator. After all, it was the Senate that was hosting the party.</p><p>"Maybe," he said despondently. "We'll see if anything comes of it. Or if it all ends up just being talk."</p><p>"You're trying to do a good thing, and good things aren't easy to do. They're even harder to do if you give up at the beginning," Rey told him.</p><p>He only sighed.</p><p>Politics were not her strong suit, and she knew the galaxy was full of difficult problems that couldn't be fixed with a lightsaber. So it was possible she didn't understand the depths of the falcon's problem, but maybe she could take his mind off of it.</p><p>She slipped out of his grasp so that she could stand directly in front of him. "Stand still," she told him.</p><p>He tilted his head slightly, to study her.</p><p>"Especially your head," she told him, laughing a little.</p><p>She put her hands on his shoulders, and for the first time, found some utility in the shoes she was wearing since they gave her a little more height.</p><p>He obeyed, and she reached up and carefully navigated her face around the beak of his mask, doing her best to make sure the snout of hers didn't hit his face. Then she lightly kissed him, letting her lips brush his for just a second before pulling away.</p><p>"You're a good man," she told him to cheer him up. "The galaxy needs more good men."</p><p>Her words had the opposite effect. </p><p>"I'm not good, I've only ever done one good thing in my life," he told her.</p><p>"Oh?" she asked. "What was that?" Trying to imagine what a person's only good deed could be.</p><p>"I once saved a girl's life," he told her seriously.</p><p>It was his seriousness more than anything that made Rey laugh. </p><p>"You have too high a standard for good deeds," she told him. "Maybe it's this event," she gestured to the dance, which was meant to commemorate the destruction of Starkiller Base. "But being good isn't just about saving lives. You taught me to dance, and I haven't felt this…this kind of easy happiness in along time. That's a good deed. And you're trying to keep a lot of children from going hungry. That certainly qualifies as good."</p><p>"Trying, not doing," he corrected her. "It doesn't matter if I don't succeed."</p><p>"That's rubbish," she told him. "Trying is what matters most. Do you know who doesn't start something if they don't know if they can finish it? Cowards. So if you’re not willing to believe you are good, will you at least believe you are brave?"</p><p>He laughed a little at that. "Well, cowardice is one thing I've never been accused of, so I'll give you that one."</p><p>"You better," she squeezed his hand and decided to change to another tactic to cheer him up. "Do you think we can get one last dance in before midnight?"</p><p>He stiffened and looked at the giant holographic chrono that hovered over the dance floor. There were maybe five minutes left until midnight. Rey realized that once again, she had managed to say the wrong thing.</p><p>"I should go," he said, pulling slowly back from her.</p><p>"What, why?" she asked, upset at the prospect of him leaving her.</p><p>"You said I made you happy, but… we're going to take our masks off in a few minutes, and then you'll recognize me, and then either you'll hate me, or worse, you'll hate yourself for not hating me."</p><p>She grabbed his hand, and a little forcefully pulled him back close to her. "I don't hate," she told him. "It’s kind of a core philosophical belief of mine."</p><p>"Oh good," he said sarcastically. "So, not only will you hate me, but I will have instigated a spiritual crisis."</p><p>Rey was wondering if the Force had brought them together for just this. He clearly carried some deep pain and guilt. Over the last few years, she had discovered that her greatest satisfaction as a Jedi did not come from fighting but from the rare moments when she could help someone find peace and comfort. </p><p>Those were the challenges that genuinely tested her because, unlike battle, she never knew if she would succeed or not. Sometimes the only one who could help a person was themself, but, as she had learned, having someone else believe in you could be incredibly powerful.</p><p>"No," she reassured him. "You won't plunge me into a spiritual crisis. I'm not saying I've never rushed to judge someone too harshly, but I've learned. So prove to me that if you're not good, you're at least brave."</p><p>Somewhere else in the ballroom, an announcer had gotten up on stage to announce the countdown to midnight.</p><p>His laugh was more genuine this time. "Appealing to my male ego?"</p><p>"Is it working?" she asked, but he had stopped moving away from her, and his hand was back on her waist.</p><p>She really couldn't stop thinking about those massive hands of his and what they would feel like on various other parts of her body.</p><p>"Yes," he admitted smiling.</p><p>Most of the crowd was now counting down with the announcer, but Rey was just holding her breath, waiting to finally see what her falcon looked like. Also, she couldn't wait to prove him wrong when she didn't hate him. </p><p>"Three…Two…One!" The crowd shouted.</p><p>He had grabbed his mask by the beak in preparation and pulled it off in one smooth gesture. Rey had been about to remove hers, but she was so startled that she froze. How could she have not recognized him?</p><p>The look in his eyes instantly told her that he thought he had been right. That she had recognized him as Kylo Ren and wanted nothing to do with him. He started to pull away once more, probably thinking he was sparing her.</p><p>"Ben?" she asked with a half-drunken laugh. Realizing her mistake, she pulled off her mask before he could pull away.</p><p>His eyes went wide as he recognized her. She smiled at him, at a loss for what to say. She felt like she should apologize for not knowing it was him, but he hadn't recognized her either. She had so many questions, so many things she had wanted to ask and say for years, but in the moment, her mind had gone blank.</p><p>He saved her from having to say anything by bending down and kissing her. Now her mind was no longer blank. Instead, it was filled with the feel of his lips against hers, his chest under her hands, his arms around her, and his tongue exploring her.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The Senator Naberrie isn't meant to be Pooja Naberrie but her daughter. Just because their mothers got along doesn't mean they do.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>For the last several years, Ben had been haunted by one thing. He had never kissed Rey.</p><p>Yes, she had kissed him when he brought her back from the dead, and it was the best moment of his life. In those weeks after Exegol, he had tried to find a chance to be alone with her, but it never seemed possible. There was always something pulling them apart.</p><p>Then she had felt the need to make a pilgrimage to Tatooine. He could never quite put into words why he couldn't go with her, except that it felt like the planet his family had been trying to escape, and going backwards felt wrong.</p><p>While she was gone, Poe had pulled him aside to show Ben that a bounty had already been placed on his head. Ben had realized then that he was never going to be able to offer Rey the life she deserved, that their future together would be one where she would always be forced to defend him because he could no longer defend himself.</p><p>So he'd left.</p><p>That didn't mean he hadn't dreamt about kissing her every single day since.</p><p>So when he saw her again after all these years, he wasn’t strong enough to resist her. He couldn't spend another four years regretting that he'd never dared to kiss her.</p><p>It was the best decision he had ever made. Rey's body seemed to fit perfectly against his. She leaned into him with everything she had, and he couldn't hold her tightly enough.</p><p>Most importantly, neither of them were half dead. They weren't worn down by fear and exhaustion. They were both magnificently alive.</p><p>Which meant eventually they had to breathe.</p><p>"Did you know?" he gasped. "What am I saying, of course, you knew."</p><p>Reality was beginning to rush back a little too quickly. He was starting to feel like an idiot for not having recognized her.</p><p>"No," she told him, her face still so close to his that he could feel her breath against his lips. "I had no idea," she laughed. "Oh, Maker, but I think Finn did."</p><p>"Finn..? Oh, the…your friend," he corrected himself before he could fall into old habits and call the former stormtrooper 'the traitor.'</p><p>"Well, I'm glad you didn't recognize him," she said. "My feelings would have been hurt if you'd recognized him and not me. Also, I told you so."</p><p>He looked at her, a little perplexed. Ben was still reeling from their kiss; from the fact that he had her in his arms at all.</p><p>"I told you I wouldn't hate you," she clarified.</p><p>"I'm glad to be wrong," he told her.</p><p>If she didn't hate him, he could kiss her again. He was about to lean down to do just that when he suddenly became aware of how many people were watching them.</p><p>He backed away, and she looked confused. "Would you…Can we maybe go somewhere else?"</p><p>He was pretty sure this was not the kind of publicity Zarli had wanted. Especially if someone realized who Rey was, and one of the other Resistance members decided that Kylo Ren should not be kissing the last Jedi.</p><p>"Yeah, okay," she said as she became aware that they had made a bit of a scene.</p><p>He put his arm around her and led her out of the ballroom. As he did so, he tried to get his comm, but his falcon mask was awkwardly wrapped around his wrist. That had been a great solution when he had been trying to hold and kiss Rey, but it was just in his way now.</p><p>He stopped for a moment and was about to ask Rey for her help when she reached over and untangled his arm from the mask to hold it along with her own.</p><p>"Thanks," he said, half mortified that she'd seen him fumbling with the thing, and half delighted that she'd known just what he'd needed. "Bring my speeder around front," he said into the comm.</p><p>"Is that your assistant?" Rey asked.</p><p>"Uh, no, she had her own party tonight. That's Arwan, tonight's security detail." Talking about assistants and security details with Rey made him feel silly and a bit small. So he changed the subject. "So, are you meant to be a Loth-wolf?"</p><p>"Yes. And what do mean meant to be? I thought it was a really good mask.” He couldn't tell if she was really hurt or teasing him.</p><p>"It was...it <i>is</i>. I just meant, not many people know about Loth-wolves, so I thought it was just me, making up some sort of sign. But I thought you might know about them, that is, being a Jedi, and…and I really like the tail."</p><p>"Oh? So you've been staring at my tail, have you?" She was definitely teasing him now.</p><p>It didn't matter, it still made him blush. Luckily they had made it outside the party, and if Coruscant's air was never quite what you'd call fresh, it was at least pleasantly cool.</p><p>Outside, a security droid was trying to explain to Arwan that he couldn't park the speeder there, but the Weequay was ignoring the droid. Ben was just glad that they wouldn't have to wait awkwardly for the speeder to arrive. </p><p>However, instead of opening the speeder door for them, Arwan approached them, a security wand in his hand. </p><p>"I'm going to need you to put your arms out," he told Rey.</p><p>"What are you doing?" Ben asked. "She's fine."</p><p>"Boss's orders," Arwan explained. "She's told you she was Resistance, right?" he asked Ben.</p><p>"Yes, I know exactly who she is, and I'm the boss," Ben argued.</p><p>"No, you’re the client, Dune is the boss. And if you want to take your girlfriend home, I'm checking her for weapons."</p><p>Before he could argue further, Rey stepped forward and put out her arms. "It's okay," she told him.</p><p>He grumbled, mostly to himself, that it was not okay. Once he had been feared throughout the galaxy, now his own security was talking back to him. </p><p>"So, where do you think I'm hiding a weapon?" Rey asked, amused.</p><p>"Don't answer that," Ben quickly stepped in.</p><p>"What?" Rey asked. "It's nice for someone to assume I'm dangerous for once. Usually, people think I'm helpless."</p><p>"And how does that work out for them?" Arwan asked.</p><p>"Usually not good. Thank you for making sure he is safe," Rey smiled at Arwan.</p><p>"Oh, yes, well, just doing my job, miss." Much to Ben's surprise Arwan actually opened the door for Rey. Who knew the gruff Weequay could be charmed?</p><p>Of course it was Rey, he realized. Ben was sure she could charm anyone. </p><p>It was as he got into the speeder he realized that Arwan had made a bit of an assumption about where they were going. </p><p>"Is there, uh, somewhere you would like to go? I mean, you can, of course, come to my place," he added hurriedly.  "But we don't <i>have</i> to go there."</p><p>"No, that would be fine," she told him. </p><p>Her hand ran down the left side of his face, and he realized she was about to kiss him. He also realized that the screen between the front and back of the speeder was down (because when did he ever care if his driver knew what was going on in the back seat?), and he leaned forward to hit the button to put it up.</p><p>"Unless you don't want to take me there?" she added, suddenly unsure.</p><p>He looked back at her. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, and she didn't seem to know it.</p><p>"Of course I do, I just didn't want to assume that…" Thank the Maker the screen was up, and Arwan couldn't hear Ben be unable to admit to the sorts of things he wanted to do with Rey. "...that I was kidnapping you," he tried to turn it into a joke.</p><p>It did not go over well. "I'm pretty sure I know what a kidnapping feels like."</p><p>He kicked himself.</p><p>"Yes, exactly, which is why I didn't want you to think… I'm a Senator now, you know? The most untrustworthy beings known throughout the galaxy?”</p><p>Judging by the stern expression on her face, he really needed to stop trying to be funny. She seemed to hold him in place with her gaze, and he was desperately trying to think of something to say or do to fix everything that had gone catastrophically wrong in the last few minutes. </p><p>Then out of nowhere, something soft hit him on the nose. He was so startled that he practically jumped. Rey was suddenly trying to bite back a smile and maintain her grave look, all while she hit him again in the face with the end of her costume tail.</p><p>"What-?" Ben was interrupted by another slap with the tail.</p><p>"You need to stop…thinking, or whatever it is you think you're doing," Rey told him. "I want to be here with you, if you want me here, then just…be here."</p><p>"I'm sorry, I-"</p><p>"Don't be sorry," she told him. "Just kiss me."</p><p>If his messed up life had taught him anything, it was how to recognize an order that couldn't be disobeyed. Also, how to lock away feelings of insecurity and doubt.</p><p>So he palmed her cheek, pulled her close, and kissed her again. He meant it to be gentle, and it started out that way. But then he felt her mouth open and the tip of Rey's tongue tracing his lips, looking for a way in. He let her, and she was suddenly devouring him.</p><p>He wrapped his arms around her, and before he knew it, she had crawled into his lap and was sitting sideways across him, and her hands seemed to be everywhere all at once as if she was afraid he'd vanish out from under her. </p><p>He couldn't decide if the speeder arrived too soon or it took too long. Either way, they must have been quite a sight as she slid off his lap, and they pulled themselves out of the speeder onto the balcony/landing pad that was the entrance to his apartments on Coruscant.</p><p>The cool night air now felt cold after having let go of Rey long enough to exit the speeder. She clearly felt the same, and he could see her rub her arms in the few moments before he got her inside.</p><p>Which was why he pulled her back into a kiss as soon as they were through the door, doing his best to rub some warmth into her arms and back.</p><p>As tempted as he was, he wasn't quite brazen enough to sweep her off into the bedroom, so instead, he pulled her deeper into the main room until they were both on his couch.</p><p>It was amazing how well she fit against him, like she had been made just to be in his arms, and he quickly lost track of time and kisses.</p><p>Eventually, though, she wiggled a little under him.</p><p>He quickly pushed himself up on his arms, "I'm sorry, I must be crushing you," he realized.</p><p>"No. Well, only in a good way." Her face was flushed and lips swollen from kissing. "It's this stupid skirt," she admitted.</p><p>He meant to ask her what she meant but was distracted as she hitched up her skirt so that the part that had been hugging her hips was now up around her waist. Then just like that, she hooked one of her legs around his, pulling it between hers.</p><p>Suddenly he could feel the heat of her center pressing against his thigh as she rubbed herself just a bit. A delighted gasp escaped her lips until she realized he was watching her, and then her pink flushed cheeks turned bright red.</p><p>Before she could say anything, he captured her lips in another kiss, while he experimentally pressed his leg against her. The kiss didn't last long as she panted with delight.</p><p>He wished he knew more about women. Would this be enough for her to get off? Part of him liked that idea; part of him wanted more than just his leg involved in the process.</p><p>"Anything you need," he told her, moving his lips to her neck for a moment. "Just let me know." He began kissing her neck in earnest, freeing her lips so he could hear what other noises she might make as she rubbed against him.</p><p>"Ben, I..?" Her thought was cut off by a little moan. She squeezed his arms. "Take off your jacket." </p><p>He didn't really want to get off of her, but he had just told her that he'd do what she wanted, and it wasn't much of an ask. As he leaned back on his heels, he realized this wasn't a bad vantage point to watch her from.</p><p>She was something of a mess. Her hair had begun to come loose, and little wisps were stuck haphazardly to the sides of her face. Her lips were swollen from Ben's kisses, he could see her hard nipples pushing against the fabric of her dress, and there was nothing dignified in the way her skirt was hitched around her waist. </p><p>Suddenly he was struck by the reality of the moment. This was Rey, actually Rey, staring up with hungry lust-filled eyes.</p><p>She watched eagerly as he removed his jacket and laughed a little when she saw the nearly useless shirt underneath. He might have felt more self-conscious doing this if his garments had actually covered more of him to begin with. </p><p>Completely bare-chested, Ben began to lead down again to kiss her once more, but she stopped him with a hand against his chest. "What about the rest?" she asked.</p><p>This did make him blush as he tried to imagine the feel of his cock against her skin. He had been trying very hard up until this point to ignore the erection he had grown when she'd been sitting on his lap in the speeder, but now he was very aware of it.</p><p>"If I do that…this will be over too soon," he admitted. </p><p>Holding her eyes with his, he took the hand that was flat against his chest and raised it to his lips. He pressed a kiss into the palm of her hand and parted his lips slightly so he could taste the salt of her skin.</p><p>"Can I touch you?" he asked into her palm.</p><p>"Aren't you?" she sighed with delight.</p><p>He pressed his leg further against her core.</p><p>"Oh?! Okay," she responded breathlessly.</p><p>He had initially thought to kiss her again, but there was something so incredible about watching her like this. He held her one hand in his left while he slid his right hand slowly up the inside of her thigh.</p><p>She had loosened her grip around his leg and scooted back a bit to give his hand access. The tips of his fingers ran up against a bit of damp lace, and he experimentally ran his fingers across it before he was daring enough to try to slip them between the bit of fabric and her skin.</p><p>All the while, he kept his eyes on hers, watching the little excited breaths she took as he tried to trace the outlines of her folds. </p><p>He tried to angle his hand for better access, but the skirt really was too tight, even hitched up like this. He was trying to engineer a solution, while also being terrified of the fact that he had no real sense of how to touch a woman in this way, when Rey suddenly scooted out from under him and off the couch.</p><p>"Did I do something wrong?" he asked with dread.</p><p>"What?" Rey was reaching behind her to the collar of the dress. "No, but this dress…I don't know how I got talked into it."</p><p>He was about to protest that she looked beautiful, but just like that, her fingers released the clasp that was the only thing holding up the bodice, and he forgot how to speak as her breasts came into full view.</p><p>Seconds later, she had shimmied the skirt off her hips. She was now wearing nothing other than a pair of heels, the lace thong he had felt, and the tail, which had evidently been strapped under the dress.</p><p>She began to reach for the tail's clasp to undo it when he found his voice again.</p><p>"Don't," he begged her as he scrambled to his feet.</p><p>"Are you sure?" she teased him. "I might-" He cut her off with a kiss.</p><p>This time as he kissed her, he let his hands roam more freely than he dared to before. They started at her waist, but one hand quickly ran up her body to palm her breast, while the other cautiously slipped a little lower, so that his fingers were just grazing her ass.</p><p>She made no move to pull away, and with slow steps, he tried to direct her towards the bedroom, while not letting his lips leave hers. This proved a difficult task for both of them, as Rey nearly stumbled in as she tried to shuffle backward in the heels she wasn't used to wearing.</p><p>He considered sweeping her into his arms and carrying her, but he couldn't decide if the faster pace was worth giving up the places his hands had just recently dared to touch.</p><p>Rey made the choice for him. Her hands gripped his shoulders, and before he quiet new what was happening, she'd pulled herself up and wrapped her legs around his waist.</p><p>Instinctively he caught her and found both his hands now firmly gripping her ass. It threw him a little off-balance, but as his feet caught up to his new center of gravity, he found he was moving much quicker towards the bedroom.</p><p>He was not at his most graceful, but he didn't care as he stumbled down on top of her and the bed. They both let out a groan as his hard length pressed down against her hot wet core, her legs tightening as she rubbed herself against him.</p><p>It was almost more than he could take, and he knew if he didn't find a chance to catch his breath, he was going to come right then and there.</p><p>"Rey," he pleaded with her, unable to put the rest of his thoughts into words. His hands slid down to her thighs, hoping he could open them just enough to give some space for his aching cock, but Rey misinterpreted. </p><p>"Yes, please touch me," she moaned, and he could feel her skin shiver under his fingers.</p><p>Her plea was almost enough to undo him, but she loosened her grip, happy to give his hands access.</p><p>This time with no pesky skirt in the way, he could easily slide his hand down between her thighs and begin to explore her folds. She was so slick and wet, and he was absolutely not letting himself think about how it might feel if it was his cock sliding against her and not his fingers.</p><p>He began to kiss his way down her neck, so he could move down her body and give his cock more space to breathe. A beautiful side effect of this was just as he was getting bold enough to press one of his fingers inside of her, his mouth found one of her breasts.</p><p>She inhaled sharply, and he tensed up. "Is that okay?" he asked.</p><p>She whined. "Kriff, Ben, please, just… I've wanted to feel your fingers inside of me for so long."</p><p>He could feel the heat rush to his face, and he was pretty sure that he was bright red all the way to the tops of his ears. Those were not words he had ever imagined, and he wondered how many times she might have touched herself and wished it was him.</p><p>The finger that had hesitated just after breaching her entrance, pushed further inside until it was completely buried in her. Ben sucked her nipple into his mouth and began carefully moving his finger in and out of her. </p><p>Her nails dug into his shoulder and the back of his head as she moaned and pushed against his hand. It wasn't long until he decided to attempt a second finger. This time when she whimpered, he knew it was from need as she eagerly took the second digit.</p><p>As wonderful as her breast was, he was overcome by the need to see his fingers disappearing inside of her. He leaned back, sitting on his heels so he could really look at her. She was still wearing her panties, which were shoved to one side to let his fingers in. As he looked at her pink folds beneath her dark curls, he had a new need. He needed to taste her.</p><p>He slid his legs off the bed onto the floor and used his free hand to drag her down near the edge.</p><p>"Ben?" she questioned between gasps. When she looked down to see him kneeling between her legs, it was her turn to blush.</p><p>"Can I taste you?" he asked.</p><p>A little nod of her head and a tiny moan were all the permission he needed, although he wasn't entirely sure how to begin. But there was something appealing about the way her juices were running down his fingers, so he started there, at the place where his fingers vanished inside of her.</p><p>The taste of her was divine, and he was sorely tempted to remove his fingers and just bury his face there. He wasn't sure Rey would forgive him if he did that as much as she seemed to like his fingers, and Ben was going to need to stretch her out with yet a third one if he was ever going to hope to fit his cock inside her.</p><p>So instead, he worked his way up until he found-</p><p>"Ben!" Her back arched as she screamed his name.</p><p>He smiled as his tongue began to trace the bundle of nerves he'd just found. Feeling cocky from the way she was responding to him, he couldn't help but be just a bit insolent. He began to use his tongue to write out an old Jedi prayer on her clit, sucking lightly at the end of each word, while he pushed a third finger inside of her.</p><p>The way she was calling out his name now, it sounded almost like she was sobbing, but her hand was still in his hair, and from the way Rey was holding him in place, it was clear she didn't want him to stop.</p><p>He hadn't even made it through the first line when he felt her contract around his fingers.Her body spasmed violently for a minute before she went quiet and still other than her panting.</p><p>As delicious as she was, he couldn't help but get up to look at his handiwork. </p><p>He'd never seen anything so beautiful as Rey lying there trying to catch her breath. Her legs were still open, giving him a beautiful view, and her hair was a wild mess. She looked thoroughly debauched, and he'd never felt quite so proud of anything as he did of having done this to her.</p><p>He kicked off one shoe, the noise caused her to open her eyes and look up at him; a silly smile touched her lips. Now that he had her attention, he raised his fingers to his mouth and sucked her juices off of them one at a time, while he managed to lose the other shoe.</p><p>She made a happy little sound in the back of her throat, and her eyes seemed absolutely fixed on him. He'd never really liked being watched, one of the reasons he'd been so happy to wear a mask all those years ago. But now he wanted nothing more than to have Rey's eyes on him.</p><p>He let his hand fall to the fly of his pants, and her eyes followed the movement. Slowly he undid the fly, pulling himself out for her to see. He couldn't help but give his own little moan as his cock finally was given a bit of the attention it had been pleading for.</p><p>Before he'd been afraid he would come too early, but after having felt Rey's tightness around his fingers, there was no way Ben was going to come before he had a chance to bury himself inside of her.</p><p>He shoved his pants down off his hips, and with Rey watching, he began to use his thumb to spread precum around the head of his cock.</p><p>They were both breathing heavily now, and he slowly got back on the bed between her legs, keeping his eyes fixed on her face. It wasn't until he positioned himself at her entrance that her eyes finally looked up to meet his.</p><p>Before he could ask, she gave him a little nod, and ever so slowly, he began to push his way inside of her, holding her eyes with his the whole time.</p><p>She was so incredibly tight that he kept expecting her to flinch, or yell in pain, or try to get away, but instead, she just let him in deeper, letting out tiny shuddering breaths.</p><p>It was when he was fully buried inside her, that she closed her eyes, and he could feel her shifting and adjusting as she got used to him. </p><p>Not moving in that moment felt like the hardest thing he had ever done yet somehow, he managed it. Just when he thought he'd go mad if they didn't move soon, Rey's eyes opened, and she began to urge him with her hips. </p><p>His arms were on either side of her, propping himself up, so he didn't crush her as he dug his fingers into the blankets to try and maintain some semblance of control. She was too much for him, her heat surrounding him as he slowly thrust in and out, wanting this to last forever, afraid that it would be over before it had barely begun.</p><p>Then one thrust drew a uniquely beautiful sound from her lips. "Yes, there," she begged him. </p><p>He could do nothing but oblige her and did everything he could to make sure to hit that one spot that seemed to be driving her wild. As long as he focused on the technical accuracy of his movements, he could try and stave off just a little longer the overwhelming feelings that were threatening to tear him apart.</p><p>But it wasn't going to be enough, he worried. He loosened his death grip on the sheets to reach between them, hoping if he touched her, she would find her release again before he was done.</p><p>Just like that, she was screaming his name as her nails dug into his shoulders. Rey was drawing him down on top of her so he could no longer hold himself fully up. She was convulsing around him, and he had no control anymore as he spilled inside of her, before collapsing on top of her.</p><p>He didn't know how long it took for coherent thoughts to return and for him to realize that he must be crushing her. Ben started to roll off of her, terrified that in the minutes after the best moment of his life he had suffocated her with his ridiculously big frame.</p><p>She whimpered a little. "Where are you going?"</p><p>"Nowhere," he promised her, hearing the hint of fear in her voice. "I just thought you might want to breathe."</p><p>She chuckled. "Breathing is overrated." </p><p>But she was clearly reassured because, without a second thought, she grabbed his arm and pulled it back over her. Within a moment, she had rearranged them so he was spooning her, and he loved how absurdly bold she was in arranging his limbs just the way she wanted. She was such a wondrous mix of bravery and insecurity, and he was pretty sure there wasn't much he wouldn't let her do to him.</p><p>He pulled her even tighter against him, and that was when he felt something soft and furry brush against his now soft cock. She was still wearing the tail. He was still too exhausted for more, but he knew he'd get his strength back, and it was going to be a magnificently long night.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Rey woke up lying on her stomach in a beautiful cocoon of warmth. It wasn't the dry ambient heat of the desert, but a soft, pleasant heat that radiated off the body that was covering her.</p><p>Ben Solo.</p><p>She might have almost believed it was the last moment of a lovely dream, but there was a soreness between her legs that wasn't like anything Rey had ever felt, despite living the hard life of a scavenger and a Jedi.</p><p><i>Ben Solo's cock did that to me,</i> she thought with delight, and despite her soreness, she found herself trying to squeeze her legs together, because, whether it was a good idea or not, she wanted more.</p><p>Evidently, he did too because asleep or not, she could feel his hard length against her hip. She wasn't sure what the polite thing to do in a situation like this was. Was it rude to wake him up for more sex?</p><p>That's when it fully sunk in that after all this time, she was sleeping in Ben Solo's bed. The night before she had been sure of one thing. Having found him again after all this time, there was no way she was going to gamble that they had time, that the galaxy wouldn't seek to separate them again.</p><p>Rey was not going to spend another four years wondering what might have been. She was determined to grab and hold on with everything she had.</p><p>But now, in the morning, she was suddenly afraid. Even with their bond gone, being with him had once again taken away her loneliness. Last night she had felt safe and loved in a way she could never remember feeling before. But what if it had just been her? What if he didn't feel the same? Could she survive without him now that she actually knew what it was like to be with him?</p><p>Rey was not the sort of person who cried easily. Sure, sometimes her eyes got a little teary, but actual crying wasn't something she did. Yet all of a sudden Rey was sobbing so hard that her body was shaking.</p><p>Ben woke up abruptly.</p><p>"Rey?" he asked, shifting his weight off of her.</p><p>Feeling him physically pull away was the last thing she wanted, and she only sobbed harder, even if some part of her brain tried to tell her he just might not have been comfortable.</p><p>"Did I hurt you?" he sounded afraid. "Please, I never meant to hurt you."</p><p>She shook her head because she couldn't speak just yet, and he rolled her off her stomach and into his arms. She buried her face against his chest, and he rocked her a little.</p><p>"Please, Rey, tell me what's wrong," he pleaded with her.</p><p>It was better like this. She could hear his heartbeat, and it calmed her. Not because she ever wanted him to hurt, but because at least she knew he cared. And if tears were still running down her face, at least she could breathe again.</p><p>"You left," she finally admitted before a new set of sobs erupted from her chest. </p><p>Rose had once told her that she needed to cry over Ben, and Rey had told her friend, that no she was fine. Now she wished she had listened. Maybe if she'd let herself cry all those years ago, she wouldn't be a complete mess right now.</p><p>"I did," he said softly, but he hugged her a little tighter.</p><p>There was something familiar about his unwavering honesty. Rey knew it wasn't in his nature to make excuses or to explain, as much as she wanted that. She wanted some reason why he had left her, but at the same time, his reaction meant that he wasn't a stranger. That he was still fundamentally the man she had once known.</p><p>Which meant there was nothing to do but poke and prod at him.</p><p>"Why? You didn't even say goodbye. I thought-" she couldn't finish, she was too scared to say everything he had meant to her, and everything she was afraid his leaving had meant.</p><p>"I couldn't say goodbye," he told her. "I never would have had the strength to leave if I'd seen you again."</p><p>"Is it because I insisted on going to Tatooine?" she asked.</p><p>"No, Rey, it was nothing you did." He grabbed her chin and forced her to look up into his eyes. "It was never you," he tried to reassure her.</p><p>The look she gave him made it clear that she needed more than that.</p><p>"Look," he finally started to explain. "While you were gone, the first bounty was placed on my head, and I realized that for the rest of my life I was going to be running from death threats. And you didn't deserve to be dragged down by all the bad things I had done, or hounded across the galaxy with me."</p><p>She believed him, at least she believed the sentiment behind his words, but his reasoning was complete garbage. "I could have protected you," she pointed out.</p><p>He stiffened a little, and she realized she had touched on what might have been the deeper issue.</p><p>"You're the last Jedi," he said flatly. "You didn't need to be my bodyguard."</p><p>"I'm not," she told him. "There's Finn. Was that it? Was it too much to watch me train Finn?"</p><p>He swallowed heavily, and she could tell she had hit a sore spot. </p><p>"I didn't want to be a burden," he said coldly, and she could feel his arms loosen around her. "Or the reason that…that you strayed from your path."</p><p>For the first time, he sounded genuinely guilty, and she just wanted to smack him.</p><p>"Because Jedi aren't supposed to form attachments?" she asked, anger in her voice. </p><p>He nodded. </p><p>"Well, who kriffing cares what a lot of dead old guys say?" She was furious now, but not really at him. </p><p>The more she had studied the Jedi over the years, the more obvious it became why they had failed him so badly, and the more she understood how his life had turned out the way it had.</p><p>"Finn married Rose, you know?" she told him. "And you know what? They are amazing, and unlike me, he's never ever tried to use the dark side. And do you know why? Because he's not alone. He doesn't need power, or whatever, he just needs her. And I…I needed you," she admitted.</p><p>The kiss surprised her. Not just the action, but how much she needed and wanted it, despite her hurt and anger. She relaxed into Ben and just gave in for a few beautiful moments, letting his tongue explore her mouth and draw her out.</p><p>He was the one who finally broke off the kiss and rested his forehead against hers. </p><p>"I needed you too," he admitted. "And I'm sorry I ruined everything."</p><p>"Maybe not everything," she admitted. "I mean, we're here together now. That has to mean something, right?"</p><p>"Rey…" he pulled back, and she could see the pain in his eyes. "I'm a Senator now."</p><p>She shrugged, unsure what that had to do with anything.</p><p>"I still have another three years in my term, and if I leave early, no matter the real reason, the syndicates and the cooperation will take it as a victory, and no one honest will ever try to run again, and….Kriff! I've become my mother."</p><p>She giggled. </p><p>"It's not funny," he insisted. </p><p>"You called yourself honest," she told him, smiling. "And you’re right, you're one of the most honest people I know, at least with other people. I'm just glad you've realized it."</p><p>"That's not what-"</p><p>She stopped him with a light kiss.</p><p>"Also, never bring up your mother while we are naked," she told him. "I never know why she shows up when she does, but I definitely don't want her here now."</p><p>A whole slew of emotions she couldn't quite keep up with crossed his face all at once. "Okay, I can agree to that, but Rey… I can't follow you around while you go looking for Jedi artifacts."</p><p>"What? Just because I was a scavenger on Jakku, you think I'm some sort of tomb raider now?" she said.</p><p>"I didn't mean-" He started to apologize, but she cut him off with yet another kiss. </p><p> She was teasing him, mostly. She'd actually done a little of that early on, thinking it would be good for Finn.</p><p>The truth was, neither she or Finn were really that interested in old Jedi temples. They had found themselves happiest when they had just stumbled into people in trouble, people who could use their help. For a while now, they had simply traveled from world to world, letting the Force guide them to where they were needed.</p><p>And after years of trusting that she would end up where she was meant to be, Rey couldn't help but believe that she had found Ben again because this was exactly where she needed to be.</p><p>"Not that I really mind," he said when she broke away. "But this," he kissed her lightly. "Isn't really a great way to have a conversation."</p><p>"Mmm," she hummed against his lips. "I actually think this is the best way to have a conversation." She kissed him again to prove her point. "But I don't need you to follow me around," she told him. "You mentioned death threats and crime syndicates?"</p><p>"Yes?" he said, not being able to follow her train of thought after the last few kisses.</p><p>"Well, it sounds like you and Corellia could use a Jedi, and I just happen to know one who is free."</p><p>For just a second, she thought he was going to protest again. Instead, he kissed her a little desperately. </p><p>"Rey," he told her seriously. "I can't see you die or get hurt again. I have bodyguards, let them do their job."</p><p>"Sure," she said noncommittally before kissing him again. If he thought she was going to just stand aside and do nothing if he was in danger, he was dumber than she thought.</p><p>But not so dumb that he wouldn't realize she hadn't agreed to what he'd asked. So she reached between them to find his cock. She’d discovered after their first-round last night that he lost all ability to think straight when she had her hands around him.</p><p>He moaned into her mouth, and his hands began to explore her body.</p><p>He was just leaning her back down onto the bed when the door to the room suddenly flew open.</p><p>"Hey boss," a young chipper woman said. "It's time to-hey…looks like you did better last night than I did."</p><p>Rey's mind went absolutely blank with shock for a moment as a strange woman just wandered into his bedroom.</p><p>"Zarli!" Ben shouted. "Get out!" as he pulled a blanket to cover up Rey.</p><p>"What?" the woman asked innocently. "I'm impressed. She's hot."</p><p>"Yes, and she's mine," he barked. "So, get out."</p><p>Rey had been starting to get a little angry, partly at him, and partly at herself. She assumed that he'd spent the years waiting for her, the way she'd waited for him. But there was something about the way he'd said, 'she's mine,' that stirred something primal in her and cooled her anger at least a little.</p><p>"Who's that?" she demanded. </p><p>"Zarli? She's my assistant," he explained.</p><p>"And she just walks into your bedroom any time she wants?" Rey growled.</p><p>"Well, not any time, I'm usually up by now and…" he was suddenly looking at her very intently, and then a goofy smile broke over his face. "Are you jealous?"</p><p>She blushed. She wanted to be mad at Ben for smiling at her, but that same giant smile made it almost impossible.</p><p>"Rey," he said slowly. "Why do you think I was covering you up? You're her type, not me. I didn't want her to get a good look at you, so she wouldn't get any ideas about trying to steal you away from me."</p><p>"Really?" Rey asked.</p><p>"Really," he told her, kissing her.</p><p>Just as the kiss started to deepen, Zarli intervened again by yelling from the next room. "Look, I hate to interrupt you getting some. But the awards ceremony is only in a few hours and you need to get ready. And something to eat. It's going to be long and boring. And you know how you get when you get hangry."</p><p>Rey now couldn't help but  laugh a little. "Oh, how do you get?" she asked.</p><p>"I don't get hangry," he objected. </p><p>“Kriff!” Rey suddenly realized. "Uh, I think I have to go to that same award ceremony, to you know, get a medal or something. And uh, I don't think I can show up in the dress I was wearing last night."</p><p>"Well," he started slowly. "If we're going to the same ceremony, I guess we'll just have to find each other afterward."</p><p>"Promise?” she asked.</p><p>"Promise," he told her.</p><p>“Okay. But just so you know, if you don’t show up, I’m going to track you down,” she teased him.</p><p>He smiled at her. “That seems fair. After all it is your turn to track me across the galaxy.”</p><p>She glared at him. “You better not make me,” she told him a little seriously. “Besides, you’re terrible at hiding, Senator.”</p><p>She giggled a little, she’d never referred to him by a title, before, and it felt strange.</p><p>He kissed her one more time. “Good, then you don’t have any excuse for not finding me.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'd love to know what people thought of this little AU. I actually had a lot of ideas while I  wrote this fic that I just knew I couldn't use if I was going to get it done on time. So I have some story ideas for what might come next for these two and if people would be interested in more I might write them. I'd love to know what you all think.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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